To-Nite! PIRATES! PIRATES! PIRATES!

For a little pillaging and plunder to wrap up your weekend, set sail with the Discovery Channel tonight. Tune in for "The Quest for Captain Kidd," "Real Pirate of the Caribbean: Captain Henry Morgan," and something called "Sunken Treasure Bling."

I love pirates. I loved pirates before they were cool. I've seen all the golden age pirate movies you've heard of and many you haven't. My favorite? AGAINST ALL FLAGS, an obscure but terrific Errol Flynn/Maureen O'Hara swashbuckler, with poor Anthony Quinn tarted up yet again in bronzer and bad Italian accent. I own both a VHS and a slightly sketchy DVD copy.

For a while, I subscribed to a pirate 'zine. I still get the email version. Yes, it has been that bad.

A play I wrote about pirates, rip-roaring (three swordfights!), heavily researched, and written with the Chieftains soundtrack to TREASURE ISLAND playing in the background, was produced before CUTTHROAT ISLAND poisoned the well. Huzzah to Ted Elliott, Terry Rossio, Gore Verbinski, Jerry Bruckheimer, Disney, et al for digging a new well, and for their somewhat counterintuitive wisdom of mixing earnestness, camp, and zombies.

Arrrr!